Home Living in France What’s an Expat to Do?

What’s an Expat to Do?

by Daley

It’s 4:35am in Bordeaux right now and I am seriously suffering from décalage horaire. 

A couple of weeks ago I got a text from my mom asking if I would like to visit California last minute…of course I said yes!

People ask me all the time if I miss the U.S. and it’s a bit hard to come up with a concrete answer.

I’m not sure if I really miss the U.S., but I certainly miss my family.

And visiting “home” reminded me just how much I miss everyone.

On the one hand, I love my life in Bordeaux, but being so far away from my parents and siblings has got me feeling pretty guilty. I feel like I’m missing out on moments and I’m not being helpful by living all the way in France. But, on the other hand, I’m not sure what difference it would make if I were living and working in the U.S. because I definitely wouldn’t be living at home.

Missing my family and feeling guilty about living abroad is making me overwhelmed. Living in France for the rest of my life feels a bit daunting when it’s always been something exciting for me before.

I know I ultimately want to be in France, at least I thought I knew. But feeling so guilty has made everything a bit confusing.

I can’t help but feel selfish.

How do the rest of you expats manage? How do you reassure your family back home while living out your own lives abroad?



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Kaitlyn August 31, 2017 - 1:32 pm

I’m moving to France to do TAPIF in just two weeks and have felt constantly guilty and selfish about going. 🙁 This is mostly due to the fact that my little sister is only 7 years old, and I don’t want her to look back on her childhood and think about me never being there for her because “I love France.” But in the end, I know that she wants me to pursue my dreams, and that she’s happy for me. (That and I also promised to send her back a box of chocolate macarons.) 🙂

Krys October 18, 2017 - 8:15 pm

I don’t have the feeling of guilt or selfishness. I actually think it’s great because my parents can live a ‘couply’ life without their children in the house. Plus, I know my family is happy for me and wants me to pursue my dreams but I do miss them de temps en temps.


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